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It’s not left vs right — it’s wrong vs louderIt’s not left vs right — it’s wrong vs louder
But I’m very young in Wookie YearsBut I’m very young in Wookie Years
Next time, I’m suggesting a “break” that involves air-conditioning and snacksNext time, I’m suggesting a “break” that involves air-conditioning and snacks
what’s the DMV equivalent of Shepardize?what’s the DMV equivalent of Shepardize?
What if Stephen King wrote Christine today, but it still featured a 25 year old Plymouth?What if Stephen King wrote Christine today, but it still featured a 25 year old Plymouth?

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  • I forgot that one must build up a tolerance to White Castle.I forgot that one must build up a tolerance to White Castle.
  • “Have you played Atari today?” Or in the last 40 years?“Have you played Atari today?” Or in the last 40 years?
  • Damn it! I’m a lawyer, not a marine biologist!Damn it! I’m a lawyer, not a marine biologist!
  • At least she gets to start her nap an hour earlier.At least she gets to start her nap an hour earlier.
  • You have to have the camera ready when opportunity knocks … or parks.You have to have the camera ready when opportunity knocks … or parks.
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my neighbor was test driving a porsche while I was picking up doggy doo

I was the third coolest person on the block (fourth if you include the dog)

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