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It’s not left vs right — it’s wrong vs louderIt’s not left vs right — it’s wrong vs louder
But I’m very young in Wookie YearsBut I’m very young in Wookie Years
Next time, I’m suggesting a “break” that involves air-conditioning and snacksNext time, I’m suggesting a “break” that involves air-conditioning and snacks
what’s the DMV equivalent of Shepardize?what’s the DMV equivalent of Shepardize?
What if Stephen King wrote Christine today, but it still featured a 25 year old Plymouth?What if Stephen King wrote Christine today, but it still featured a 25 year old Plymouth?

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  • All I’m saying is if it was that important you’d think the cookbook would have used bold faceAll I’m saying is if it was that important you’d think the cookbook would have used bold face
  • A day earlier he would have been witness to a ham and spinach omeletteA day earlier he would have been witness to a ham and spinach omelette
  • I was comforted with the knowledge that, for the most part, matter is neither created nor destroyed.I was comforted with the knowledge that, for the most part, matter is neither created nor destroyed.
  • We were each old enough that I don’t think either of us was wearing it ironicallyWe were each old enough that I don’t think either of us was wearing it ironically
  • Mr. Clean would have made more senseMr. Clean would have made more sense
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My son wanted his mother to drive him to school because I drive too slow

I’m like a Bizarro Sammy Hagar

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