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  • “But I took her away from all that and now she works for me. My name is Steve Austin, astronaut, a man barely alive”

    Read More “But I took her away from all that and now she works for me. My name is Steve Austin, astronaut, a man barely alive”Continue

  • Ironically, it was an Australian bottle with a twist cap.

    Read More Ironically, it was an Australian bottle with a twist cap.Continue

  • That tangy zip you taste is lead

    Read More That tangy zip you taste is leadContinue

  • I thought the cookies had a slight lead aftertaste

    Read More I thought the cookies had a slight lead aftertasteContinue

  • The fact that it was more festive was just an added benefit.

    Read More The fact that it was more festive was just an added benefit.Continue

  • I don’t believe in stereotypes. I prefer to hate people on a more personal basis

    Read More I don’t believe in stereotypes. I prefer to hate people on a more personal basisContinue

  • Australian food doesn’t count against an American diet

    Read More Australian food doesn’t count against an American dietContinue

  • I was hoping there’d be Cool Ranch Doritos instead of cake for dessert.

    Read More I was hoping there’d be Cool Ranch Doritos instead of cake for dessert.Continue

  • Kind of like being dumped by text message

    Read More Kind of like being dumped by text messageContinue

  • Russ, when they close down the road they put up big signs…like this one!

    Read More Russ, when they close down the road they put up big signs…like this one!Continue

  • You’d think by now my iPhone would know me better than to assume I’d walk somewhere

    Read More You’d think by now my iPhone would know me better than to assume I’d walk somewhereContinue

  • Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of clutch in the morning

    Read More Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of clutch in the morningContinue

  • The last big party before everything shut down

    Read More The last big party before everything shut downContinue

  • She did it pro bono

    Read More She did it pro bonoContinue

  • there was much giggling by one or both of us

    Read More there was much giggling by one or both of usContinue

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