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  • I wish there was a “pause” and “rewind” button right next to itI wish there was a “pause” and “rewind” button right next to it
  • Nobody wants him, They just turn their heads, Nobody helps him, Now he has his revengeNobody wants him, They just turn their heads, Nobody helps him, Now he has his revenge
  • Come to think of it, that’s my strategy for lifeCome to think of it, that’s my strategy for life
  • Although I made record time getting out of there.Although I made record time getting out of there.
  • Wait until he figures out what one-third of that crappy settlement is…Wait until he figures out what one-third of that crappy settlement is…

To be fair lawyering does age you

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When in doubt just teach a square knot

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using the amazon box to tumble down the stairs

I should have saved the packing peanuts

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i used a neti pot without the salt and it really burned

I think I water-boarded myself

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dinner reservations interrupted ending of naked son asimov

As it turns out (SPOILER) the butler did not do it

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Although I made record time getting out of there.

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Half of a Half

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Shag Enchanted Vespa

Enchanted Vespa

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Narcissism was the original “find my iPhone” app

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roller skate disco party

Polyester is the new black

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