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She had time. I had groceries melting.She had time. I had groceries melting.
 She should have tried to “Lose weight deliciously with the aid of Ayds” She should have tried to “Lose weight deliciously with the aid of Ayds”
Great Minds Mosh AlikeGreat Minds Mosh Alike
They are part of the Costco GenerationThey are part of the Costco Generation
A hot wash cloth and Cinnamon gumA hot wash cloth and Cinnamon gum

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  • The Canis lupus familiaris stalks it’s prey, and adds a slice of avocado 🥑The Canis lupus familiaris stalks it’s prey, and adds a slice of avocado 🥑
  • All I’m saying is if it was that important you’d think the cookbook would have used bold faceAll I’m saying is if it was that important you’d think the cookbook would have used bold face
  • Childhood dreamsChildhood dreams
  • Unsettling news to her family, I’m sure.Unsettling news to her family, I’m sure.
  • Who likes Family Circus? “Not Me”Who likes Family Circus? “Not Me”

I was expecting Joey Greco to blare from the PA

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I’m just glad it wasn’t another process server yelling my name from across the street

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Enjoying other familes’ dysfunction this Christmas

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chimney 3 syllables

I supposed it was okay in Mary Poppins

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I would rather they focused on the Fifth Commandment

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What the hell did I put on my salad, then?

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Sayings have to start sometime

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It’d probably be easier to just subscribe to the Sirius app

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To be fair lawyering does age you

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When in doubt just teach a square knot

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