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  • In space … no one can hear you vomit

    Read More In space … no one can hear you vomitContinue

  • Again, one should consult the Urban Dictionary

    Read More Again, one should consult the Urban DictionaryContinue

  • magic trick for my dog

    Read More Ta-Dah!Continue

  • I was hoping for The Axe Effect

    Read More I was hoping for The Axe EffectContinue

  • i bought shells for the shotgun his grandpa just bought him

    Read More “You’ll shoot your eye out, kid!”Continue

  • Hopefully she won’t have to call for a price check for my medication

    Read More Hopefully she won’t have to call for a price check for my medicationContinue

  • Of course that doesn’t explain my hair

    Read More Of course that doesn’t explain my hairContinue

  • which I’ve now used more than Black’s Law Dictionary

    Read More which I’ve now used more than Black’s Law DictionaryContinue

  • Next we will watch Bloody Mary in the bathroom mirror

    Read More Next we will watch Bloody Mary in the bathroom mirrorContinue

  • Where’s Mrs. Olson when I need her

    Read More Where’s Mrs. Olson when I need herContinue

  • Almost had a tragedy in the hideout

    Read More Almost had a tragedy in the hideoutContinue

  • If genetics are determinative, there will be few rims in his future

    Read More If genetics are determinative, there will be few rims in his futureContinue

  • I peaked three years ago and didn’t even notice

    Read More I peaked three years ago and didn’t even noticeContinue

  • I’m a multi-tasker

    Read More I’m a multi-taskerContinue

  • Waiting for him to tell the story about chopping down the jujube tree

    Read More Waiting for him to tell the story about chopping down the jujube treeContinue

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  • I left it ambiguous as to whether I served, or went to the army surplus store in high schoolI left it ambiguous as to whether I served, or went to the army surplus store in high school
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  • He should have opened my migraine tracker app while he was at itHe should have opened my migraine tracker app while he was at it

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