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  • Welcome to presbyopia

    Read More Welcome to presbyopiaContinue

  • Just to be safe, I verified it was not yet a thing per Urban Dictionary.

    Read More Just to be safe, I verified it was not yet a thing per Urban Dictionary.Continue

  • I guess I could use it to open more Amazon packages

    Read More I guess I could use it to open more Amazon packagesContinue

  • And that is why you never sort by new.

    Read More And that is why you never sort by new.Continue

  • 🎶 We are the mediocre Presidents. You won’t find our faces on dollars or on cents. There’s Taylor, there’s Tyler, there’s Fillmore and there’s Hayes…🎶

    Read More 🎶 We are the mediocre Presidents. You won’t find our faces on dollars or on cents. There’s Taylor, there’s Tyler, there’s Fillmore and there’s Hayes…🎶Continue

  • Life is full of choices and only one used to have a prize in every box.

    Read More Life is full of choices and only one used to have a prize in every box.Continue

  • “Is it safe?”

    Read More “Is it safe?”Continue

  • I still like them better than those arrogant  universal donors

    Read More I still like them better than those arrogant universal donorsContinue

  • Where’s the love? It’s not like I was writing about Ringo the 4th.

    Read More Where’s the love? It’s not like I was writing about Ringo the 4th.Continue

  • Ironically this happened AFTER my meetings stopped featuring doughnuts

    Read More Ironically this happened AFTER my meetings stopped featuring doughnutsContinue

  • Hey Siri – make my kid go outside

    Read More Hey Siri – make my kid go outsideContinue

  • bébé phoque

    Read More It was probably just as funny as it was in 1066Continue

  • Of course it’s the “35-second rule” in dog years

    Read More Of course it’s the “35-second rule” in dog yearsContinue

  • >>>[unintelligible mumbling continues]

    Read More >>>[unintelligible mumbling continues]Continue

  • Waiting for astronauts Bob and Doug to take off, eh? (look at those fancy tuques)

    Read More Waiting for astronauts Bob and Doug to take off, eh? (look at those fancy tuques)Continue

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Random Posts

  • We threw them away along with the leftover potato latkes.We threw them away along with the leftover potato latkes.
  • “Congratulations on cleaning out the junk drawer, and may you be prosperous”“Congratulations on cleaning out the junk drawer, and may you be prosperous”
  • 🎶 She’s real fine our (Bottle of) 409 🎶🎶 She’s real fine our (Bottle of) 409 🎶
  • You never really know someone until “Private Eyes” comes onYou never really know someone until “Private Eyes” comes on
  • 🎶 We are the mediocre Presidents. You won’t find our faces on dollars or on cents. There’s Taylor, there’s Tyler, there’s Fillmore and there’s Hayes…🎶🎶 We are the mediocre Presidents. You won’t find our faces on dollars or on cents. There’s Taylor, there’s Tyler, there’s Fillmore and there’s Hayes…🎶

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