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  • Again, one should consult the Urban DictionaryAgain, one should consult the Urban Dictionary
  • Hopefully we can get the whiskey smell out of his thermos since I had to Irish up his Kool-AidHopefully we can get the whiskey smell out of his thermos since I had to Irish up his Kool-Aid
  • Same genus … different worldSame genus … different world
  • It’s like Touch ID but with peanut butter and jelly.It’s like Touch ID but with peanut butter and jelly.
  • Don’t get me started on the Welsh RabbitDon’t get me started on the Welsh Rabbit

I have no idea what “Angry Octopus Cries Sugar Happiness” is, but I’m definitely buying it

His rest stop became a meet and greet

picking up car from tow yard

Maybe he read it as: “Private property? No! PARKING!

buying wine at Costco

Domaine de la Romanée-Conti was already taken

🎶 Straight outta Michelob ULTRA Arena 🎶

my tire repair kit expired and left me and my bicycle stranded

I also learned to wait a few extra minutes before your ride to fully charge your phone

returning amazon to Whole Foods

We walked out with a $42 block of Époisses de Bourgogne cheese. We didn’t return a Bluetooth speaker—we bartered it. OR: Next up — Sprouts for our Temu returns

trouble shooting parents iPhone many tabs safari

The phone wasn’t running slow — it was just overwhelmed with wisdom

Sheriff, I regret to inform you… the thermometer didn’t survive the quick draw.

Add “Bernard Goetz”and you could have a limerick

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